My week: Tara Fitzgerald, actress

Inside the day-to-day life of Britain's cultural movers and shakers

Interview by Benjamin Secher
Published: 24 Oct 2004

Monday
We started the third and penultimate week of rehearsals for Clouds - a 1970s Michael Frayn comedy set in Cuba, in which I play a female novelist - by moving to swanky rehearsal rooms in Hammersmith. We had been plagued by noise in our previous two places, so were hoping it would be third time lucky but, by lunchtime, construction work had started next door. Rehearsals didn't finish until 10pm, when I slowly walked home to Fulham, turning things over in my mind. At this critical stage, I am too scared to let the play out of my head even for a moment.

Tuesday
I began the day in the gym. Acting is easier after exercise: it warms up your heart, prepares you to absorb your character's DNA. Michael Frayn came to see the afternoon read-through. He told us to pick up the speed a little, and had some salient advice for each of us. Although my role is less gargantuan than some I've had, Michael's script demands a very muscular speech form, and that type of articulacy takes practice. Back at home, I tried to watch The Human Stain on video, but was too agitated to concentrate.

Wednesday
I had a first fitting of my costume: a sort of floaty, 1970s hippy affair, not so different from the kind of stuff I wear anyway. The boys' wardrobes looked rather less flattering, with an awful lot of polyester about. In the evening, I met a Cuban musician at a party. In hindsight, I should probably have asked him about Cuba - it might have helped with the play - but he was slightly smug, so I couldn't quite bear to.

Thursday
I woke up feeling vulnerable, and dragged my heels all the way to rehearsal like a reluctant child on the way to school. Rehearsing in a group, it can be reassuring to see the other actors go through exactly the same kind of crises of confidence - flickers of brilliance followed by flickers of despair.

In the evening, I watched the Secret Life of Walter Mitty on DVD, starring comic genius Danny Kaye. I had a fitful night, tormented by dreams, as I often am during rehearsals.

Friday
Before heading off, I spent some quiet time learning my lines over an enormous cup of tea. Being 1970s theatre, the play has no proper set, so today's rehearsal was devoted to making a Cadillac out of chairs.
Then we all had a drink in the bar - the first time the whole cast has relaxed together during the rehearsals. In the evening, I called my mother. I am sure it's boring for her to listen to me ranting about the acting process, but she was married to the actor Norman Rodway, so she knows what to expect.

I wouldn't want to inflict a mid-rehearsal me on anyone else.

'Clouds' is at Cambridge Arts Theatre (01223 503333) from Thur until Oct 30, then touring to Malvern, Richmond, Guildford and Bromley until Dec 4